I'm not Julie anymore. I have a new name. Its mom. Someday I will say I want to change my name - I'm not mom anymore! LOL Dont all mom's say that at one point or another especially when they get this
But I like being "Mom" It is still strange for me to answer the phone and hear "Is this Audrey's mom?" When I go places "Ok mom you can hold her now." "Alright mom bring her over here" At daycare. "Look Audrey's mom is here" "Tell Audrey's mom bye" Everywhere else, even if I do not get referred to as mom I only get Audrey related questions. How is Audrey! Do you have pictures of Audrey. I AM AUDREY"S MOM.
However, as Julie, I still haven't quite figured out who Audrey's mom is. I have not found the balance yet between Julie and Audrey's mom. I knew Julie very well LOL I was comfortable with who I was, I knew what I wanted, I knew what I was doing. I was good at Julie! Now as Audrey's mom I forget things all the time, I dont know what to do most of the time, and some days are just survived.
Its getting better, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. But I am working on finding out who I am again. I need to find the perfect balance between being Julie and being Audrey's mom. I will get there and someday soon I will be able to say;
HI! I am JULIE, AUDREY's MOM :)
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Audrey....aka "superstar"!
ReplyDeleteOh, I love this post! I feel this exact same way so many times. It is so easy to lose yourself in this new role.. and then become resentful of that. I am working to find that balance too. One day, it will come.
ReplyDeleteAll women do that! You're doing an awesome job JULIE! Btw when you give birth you sometimes give up the rights to the brain! I'm very proud of you and keep up the good work............. Ginger
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